Wherever you look, you’ll see pretty much the same message.
You’ll see magazine covers, TV shows – the entire media – telling you how to become more attractive to men, how to look better, how to behave in a relationship, and how to keep a guy.
Basically, from the moment you become self-conscious, the world is telling you how to be girlfriend and wifey material.
One would be forgiven for thinking that, over time, things had changed and that the message that we get now is different from the one the media promoted a few decades ago. .
However, if you dig a little deeper, you’ll see that we haven’t evolved as much as we think we have.
The advice may have a different wrapping paper but it’s actually almost the same as it was in the past.
Wherever you look, there exists this incredible pressure on women.
We have to be good wives, amazing mothers, have a career while maintaining an immaculate household, and be innovative in the bedroom so our partner doesn’t get bored.
We also have to be great cooks and keep on top of our finances – all while wearing high heels, flawless makeup, and a fabulous hairdo.
The same goes when it comes to dating and romantic relationships. In fact, this is where it’s most expected of women.
You can’t be too available, right? Otherwise, men will only want to sleep with you and dump you afterwards.
However, you can’t turn them down too often either. After all, nobody likes an unapproachable girl.
When you’re married or in a committed relationship, it’s pretty much your duty to make things work. It’s your job to save a broken marriage and to make sure your partner doesn’t walk away from you.
Despite only being a human being, it appears that you’re not allowed to make mistakes.
Every move you make is placed under a magnifying glass and carefully observed by the entire world.
So, what the world is trying to tell you is that you have to be flawless – mentally, physically and emotionally.
You’re not allowed to have a bad day, to feel lousy, or to have cellulite, split ends, or be carrying a few extra pounds.
If you have some imperfections, you should do your best to hide them. That is if you ever want to be seen, heard, and chosen by a guy.
What about those men your world seems to revolve around, though? I don’t see any of them trying to reach perfection, do I now?
It seems that girls have been taught to be perfect for imperfect men from a very young age. Where is the justice in that?
Most importantly – what’s the point?
Don’t get me wrong: this is not me telling you not to work on yourself. This is not me advising you against self-improvement.
On the contrary, I’m all for your individual empowerment. I’m rooting for you to become the best possible version of yourself.
However, there is a big difference between making yourself better mentally, emotionally, and physically because you’re the one who wants it and making all of these modifications to be more likeable to the opposite s*x.
There is a huge difference between changing some things YOU don’t like about yourself and doing it so you can fit in the box or fulfill society’s unrealistic standards and expectations.
If you’re doing all of this for yourself, good for you. Carry on with the good work!
Although, even if you are, I have to disappoint you and tell you that such a thing as perfection doesn’t exist. You can work on yourself but you’ll always have some flaws.
So, it’s much better to accept and love those imperfections. After all, they’re all a part of the person you are.
On the other hand, if you’re doing all of this for the sake of one particular imperfect man or to please the entire opposite s*x, stop it right there.
Let me tell you a secret: a guy who is focused on your flaws and wants to change them is not the one for you. In fact, the right man for you will never ask you to be perfect.
You know what the best part is? He’ll love you just the way you are and you two will be imperfectly perfect together!