You’ve been besties with that gorgeous girl/guy for quite some time now and have just realized that you have the hots for them.. Meanwhile, you treasure your close bond but obviously want a more intimate and sensual relationship. Hence, how do you get out of this redundant “friendzone” ?
Better yet, what is this so called “friendzone”? In today’s society, this general term means,being in a situation that renders the other partner of a friendship to start wishing being in a relationship that is s_-ual, where as the other party does not. Plainly enough, this friend zone is therefore considered to be an unwanted condition by the person rejected. The person who has been rejected is termed as”friend zoned”.
This friendzone concept typically has a meaning of women being in need of having s_- with their desirable male friends (guys who have no feelings for them) but can be closely linked to the other popular phrase the “nice guy syndrome”.
HOW TO KNOW YOU ARE IN THE FRIENDZONE
This is definitely not the most fun situation to be in. Yet we may all encounter this at one point or another in our lives when we realize that we have deeper, erotic feelings for that person we are intensely attracted to. If you’ve invested in the relationship with your pal, you may not want to jeopardize it and ruin your close friendship. So how do you know what to look for to know if you think that you are just a “friend”?
The last thing that you want to hear from your potential mate is “But we’re friends!” Even though you guys have gone out to lunch and dinner a couple times, that other person just didn’t recognize that you were trying to take things up a notch. Here are a few ways to know in advance if you are in the abysmal friendzone.
SHE TAKES YOU TO THE MALL TO HELP HER BUY LINGERIE
You do not want to be her sidekick for any feminine products such as makeup, perfume, or lingerie. Anything she uses to attract and please a man will be bought with someone that she will use to bounce her opinions and ideas off. Just think about it, if you wanted to buy clothes for a date, would you ask your date what clothes you should wear? Unless you’re already her lover or boyfriend, the guy who buys her panties with her will never be the one ripping them off.
SHE TELLS YOU ABOUT GUYS SHE WANTS
In the words of the late Dawson Leery, you don’t want to be the guy she tells her boy adventures to. You want to be the boy adventure himself. If she’s telling you about her dates, it means you’re not one of them.
NOT MUCH TOUCHING GOING ON
It is really hard to start getting intimate if your relationship has been ordinarily platonic. To break this monotony, start with simple touches such as quick hugs, light shoulder squeezes or brushing her hair out of her eyes. Even a relaxing massage or guiding her through a busy room by holding her elbow will help to get her accustomed to your touch.
SHE CAN CRY AROUND YOU
Most women would feel mortified to have their boy interest see them cry (at least before they’ve been dating a while). If you are the shoulder, you are not the guy they’re pining over. Also, if she’s telling you stories that would make most men not want to date her, why are you hearing them?
SHE SAYS, “YOU’RE SUCH A GOOD FRIEND.”
It’s so obvious, I almost didn’t put this in, but many men can still think, “Well maybe we’re not JUST friends,” when they hear this. If she says this, then you really are just a plain old good pal.
SHE PLANS WHAT YOU ARE DOING TOGETHER
The man in her life will have no trouble taking the lead. If she’s calling the shots, it means you’re not let her be the lady she wants to be. This can change if you’ve been dating a while, but at first, you should be the one who decides what’s going on. When a woman has to lead, it kills her attraction.
YOU’VE BEEN ACTING LIKE THE KARATE KID
Ever since you’ve known her you’ve been acting like this pathetic dude. Watch this movie again, if it’s been a couple decades. Daniel-San does get the girl in the made-up story, but his behavior is so wuss-like and indecisive that any woman would treat him as a friend. He never initiates touching, gets upset when her other friends come around, and never makes a definite move.
Watch out for these seven signs, and avoid the traits that come with them. If it’s too late and you are classified as a friend, don’t worry about it. It’s good to have female friends to have fun and hang out with . However, in the future, you can now nip these things in the bud and indulge in a possible romantic relationship..
MISTAKES THAT WILL PUT YOU IN THE FRIEND ZONE
Now these 5 things are what men do when interacting with women that automatically makes them candidates for her friend zone.
You rarely get to appreciate that which is ever present and the same applies in the dating game. A lot of men think that constantly flooding their prospective girlfriend with attention will magically make her see you as ‘mister reliable” and this will make her want to date you. While this reasoning seems logical on some level, in reality, it really doesn’t work out like that at all.
Acting clingy sends the message that this chic is your number one focus and that your life constantly revolves around her. Believe it or not, this is the WRONG message to send a girl. Girls like a guy who has a life and other goals and interests, which are not her. Remember that a clingy man = a dependent man = friend zone material.
Since she wants you to be independent, be mysteriously distant every now and then, and don’t bend over backward to please her every desire. Let her miss you. This way she will appreciate you more and possibly develop deeper feelings for you.
BEING OVERLY NICE & POLITE
This means that when you try to be the “Perfect Gentleman” all the time you send out the wrong signals. That message is this: I am trying too hard to gain your approval and your attention by appearing perfect.
So unless you really are royalty or filthy rich and have the money and wardrobe to match, then please avoid the perfect gentleman approach to alluring women. Ignore everything mommy said about always being nice to girls. Mix things up to appear unpredictable and exciting to women, Be a bit arrogant (but always respectful) yet at the same time be a charming guy. If you mix things up like this she will be attracted to you because you don’t have boring, dull traits but instead can light up some fires to get things heated.
SHARING GOSSIP WITH HER
DO NOT engage in mindless gossip PERIOD! Few things make a guy look worse than for him to be a hot mouth gossip. It presents the image that you have nothing better to do than to dwell on the lives of others. Also, gossip is usually associated with girls, so a guy constantly gossiping portrays a feminine image. Do you want to be her friend or her boyfriend? You do the math.
BEING THE WRONG KIND OF FUNNY
When women say that they want a man with a good sense of humor, a lot of men misunderstand what kind of humor she really means. Please note that although all women like “funny guys”, I am still yet to meet a woman that wants to date a clown. The kind of humor that women love is called ‘Cocky Humor’. It is a mix of playfulness, extreme confidence and wit.
HOW TO GET OUR OF THE FRIENDZONE
The idea of being friend zoned is real, but do not make it to be the end of your love life. It’s actually a great stepping stone for you. If you want to create a bond and great relationship with someone,this concept is the best place to start. Here are some tips on how you can get out of this state and start having a more intimate and loving relationship with the girl to be.
BE A GREAT FRIEND
It’s said that out of friendship sprouts love. This can work in your favor especially if you treat that lady friend with passion and respect. One you get friend zoned, don’t ruin your friendship or push them away. Stay with them. Show them what you are worth. Be that guy that knows how to put a smile on her face or be the shoulder to lean on when her days are too hard to handle. Use this opportunity to make them see the exceptional qualities that you have and eventually, that girl they may fall in love with you. Don’t rush, show them that you can be a great friend to have.
WHAT YOU HAVE IN COMMON
Opposites attract but only for a short while. Ever heard of the phrase “like two peas in a pod”? Friends who have a close knit relationship and know each other’s quirks will more likely end up as a couple.
Studies have revealed that people who have similar names are more likely to fall in love. Be careful though and don’t try so hard to pretend to like all the things she likes or it’ll be creepy and weird as if you are trying too hard to be her everything. Be confident in your own way, knowing that you have a warm and winning personality.
EMBRACE YOUR DIFFERENCES
Acceptance is the key to flourish a friendship. Being a true companion and developing a real understanding of each other is a valuable trait in any relationship. Show that girl that you can connect to her, that you cherish and take to heart her beliefs and views. Even if you don’t really agree on everything, always show respect. Acknowledge her attitudes on various topics. As long as you are open minded this will show that you are understanding and empathetic.
SHOW ADEQUATE AFFECTION
Show that girl that you appreciate hanging out with her. A simple touch is enough to say that you like enjoy spending time with her. This will help her feel better about themselves and soon enough she’ll get to associate all those good vibes to having you around.
CULTIVATE HER EMOTIONALLY
This may sound that you are manipulating her, but in all friendships there are different levels of emotional dependence. This will form over time the more interact and partake in activities together. Once you show that you are dependable and trustworthy, she’ll learn to cherish you more. Take precautions to not overdo it, because it could cut into her personal space and time. Be cool, yet on the ready.
HOW TO GET OUT OF THE FRIENDZONE SUMMARY
Many have falsely persecuted themselves once they are friend zoned. Once this girl sees you as a friend and nothing more, it’s like an end all be all. However, use it as a chance to be closer to her. Don’t believe that it’s the end for you, accept it as a challenge.
The friend zone is a normal state for both men and women to be in. In all honesty, most relationships start from being friend zoned and later developing into something more loving and passionate..Any relationship requires diligence, trust and love. Add some excitement and unpredictability to your platonic friendship and watch it thrive. Let that girl know how you feel without coming on too strong and you just might be able to turn that friendly bond into a more intimate and caring relationship.