So, you really like this girl and you feel like you should make the first move but you’re not sure how to do it. You don’t want to do something that will scare her away from you because every step you take is equally important. And that is when the anxiety kicks in.
You become anxious about the most trivial things, like: Should I sit on her left or right side? Should I ask her if I can hold her hand? Should I be wearing this scent? By contemplating all of this, you forget the most important thing, which is almost the only thing you’ll ever need to make a move on a girl and that is: to be relaxed.
Think of it this way—if you’re not relaxed, she will sense it and she will not feel comfortable, which instantly ruins your chances of kissing her or something more. If a girl is not comfortable around you, you cannot proceed to other steps that will make her approve your actions and enjoy them.
The first step to making a move on a girl is to stay relaxed. If you’re thinking about asking her out, approaching her at a party or at school, if you’re thinking about hugging and kissing her, the first thing that should come to your mind is to chill. I know the pressure is high and the more you like the girl, the harder it is to stay relaxed.
But try to understand that if you stay relaxed, the chances that she’s going to reject your invitation become really low. Be cool. Act like you don’t really care about her (even though you know it’s a lie) but if a woman senses that you’re not that into her, she will immediately start wondering whether you like her or not and she will be more than happy to date you.
But if you act like she’s the only girl in the world for you and treat her like a queen, she will most definitely lose interest before you even ask her out. And even if she accepts your invitation, the chances she’s going to friendzone you are really high.
Confidence is the key.
Play it cool, stay relaxed and this will show her that you are confident in yourself and in what you are doing. No girl can resist a guy like this. Confidence is your number one friend when it comes to girls so please try to memorize this! Confidence wins everything. It makes you appear ten times hotter and bolder than you actually are.
Now you’re wondering how you can appear confident when you’re being anxious about every single detail and you want everything to be perfect. Congratulations, you’re on to something.
Do you often wonder how such a beautiful girl could ever date a guy like him? She’s the embodiment of beauty and he looks like just a random guy you meet on the street every day. But that guy knows something you’re about to learn now. That guy knows that even if he doesn’t look that good or he’s not that confident in himself, he can always pretend to be and she will not know.
And it’s true. If you’re not confident in yourself, you can always fake it. If you pretend that you’re all relaxed and chill, she will buy it and trust me, she will fall for it. Remember that you’re equally worth it, just like the girl you like. Don’t let her beauty overwhelm you and make you feel less worthy of being with her.
You know it’s not true. I’m sure you have some bada** qualities that will make her fall to her knees. Now, when you’ve overcome all of these psychological barriers, you can proceed to the rest of the steps that will help you make a move on the girl you like.
HOW TO MAKE A MOVE ON A GIRL (AND MAKE HER YOURS)
1. Ask her out
Yup. Asking her out is the first step that will get you to your dreamland. Now, the question is not where to ask her out but the question is how to do so. Always pay attention to how you do something and not where you’re going to do it or when. So, you decide whether you feel more comfortable with the casual or the not too casual version.
You decide whether you want to take her out to the movies or you want to watch one at home. Or if you would rather take her to a museum, why not. Girls love diversity and it’s all about making them feel special. So, you have to pay attention to how you are going to ask her out. Try the following method: Chill. Breathe out, breathe in. Pick up your phone or go to her and simply ask her: Hey, I was wondering, would you like to go to the movies tonight? Just keep it simple.
You see, it’s a simple sentence of thirteen words you need to utter to her. Don’t overcomplicate it because there’s no need for it. If you happen to be at a party and you want to ask her out, just introduce yourself, say something interesting (be humorous) and subtly ask her out by saying: I think we should see that (funny) movie… That way, she will not be pressured into anything and she will be happy to accept your invitation.
2. Touch her
By touching, I mean holding hands, hugging her or other cute gestures that simply work any time. So, the two of you are watching a movie and now you have to level up and involve some physical touch in order to show her your affection. When you feel it’s the right moment for touching or holding her hand, don’t hesitate to do it. It’s all about feelings.
If your brain is telling you that it is time to do it, then listen to it and act accordingly. If you don’t listen to your gut, you will most likely end up confusing her and making the whole thing awkward. And you don’t want awkwardness. Awkwardness is for newbies. You want to send her the message that you appreciate her and you will not rush her into anything if she’s not ready for it.
By holding her hand, giving her a hug, and touching her from time to time, you’re preparing her for what is about to come. And if you skip these steps of light physical touch, you will never be able to get to some intense touching (if you catch my drift).
3. Kiss her
The biggest dilemma of all is: When is the right time to kiss her? Well, the right time is when you FEEL is the right time. And it can never be otherwise. Once you feel that the moment has come, lean in, close your eyes and kiss her slowly. You don’t want to rush things! Kiss her slowly, then look into her eyes and try to smile (if you can).
After that, you can kiss her some more but make sure that she’s enjoying it. If she looks like she’s not in the mood for kissing, you should consider aborting the mission immediately. If that happens, then wait for some other time when she will be ready. But always kiss her like you really mean it. Don’t make her question your intentions or sense that you’re a little bit insecure about what you’re doing. Do it like a boss and she will fall for you instantly.
4. Pull away and then continue
I know this sounds weird because why would you pull away now that you’ve gone this far? Well, women are not as simple as men. You need to make them want more. So, when you start kissing her, when you feel it’s time to stop doing so, pull away (but make sure the transition looks natural) and then observe her body language and her intentions. If she seems like she wants more, then give her more (but not yet).
Wait a little bit longer until she is at boiling point and then start kissing her again and include some touching as well. In this phase, she will be unable to resist you because she’s waited for you for so long (when you really want someone, seconds feel like hours). And that is when you’ve won.
Now you can do whatever the hell you want because she will be unable to say no. Staying calm and relaxed will make you more desirable and that is why she will want more of you and the only thing you need to worry about now is making sure to give it to her.
5. Always check that she’s comfortable with what you’re doing
There’s a fine line between being pushy and being passionate. And it’s all in her mind. If she’s in the mood, she will see you as someone who is kissing her passionately and with care and she will enjoy it. But if she’s not in the mood, she will see you as someone who is pushing her to do things she doesn’t really enjoy doing at that moment.
And you don’t want that. So, always make sure that she’s comfortable with what you’re doing. If her body language and gestures are not telling you anything about how she feels, try simply asking her: Do you like it when I do this/that? If she confirms and you can see it in her eyes that she’s being sincere, you have the green light to continue with whatever you were doing.
But if you sense that she could be lying only to appear polite, try changing tactics and include some variations. Try to be creative in everything you do and if you’re not creative by nature, you can always Google it and try to memorize some of it. Also, don’t make it look like you’re trying hard to appease her because that is not hot.
If you’re trying really hard to meet her needs and by that you’re neglecting yours, it will not be good. Physical contact, holding hands, kissing, and having s*x are all about mutual initiation and consent. If you don’t skip any of these, I guarantee you that you will make a move on her like a boss and make that girl yours.