Letting go of an ex that you have been with for a while can be hard—especially if he knows just what to say to lure you back in just when you were almost out of that toxic circle and make you change your mind, yet again.
Going back to the thing that you know is no good for you can be really toxic for you, and finding the strength to let go of it once and for all can be challenging. There are always lingering feelings and the sense of familiarity and comfort that you don’t want to let go of… But the sooner you do, the sooner you will realize what a good decision that was and be able to focus on better things for yourself.
Here are some proven ways for you to let go of your toxic ex and move on from him, but this time, without looking back!
1. Remind yourself of the bad times
Nostalgia can play tricks on your mind, partly blocking all the negative aspects of a relationship and making you think that it was better than it actually was. Don’t let it.
Think of the reason (or reasons) why you broke up in the first place. And then ask yourself if anything has actually changed or are you simply willing to settle in order not to be alone? If things have stayed the same and nothing seems to be getting better, leave once and for all. Girl, you know you can do better than that!
2. Don’t let s*x be the only reason why you’re staying
It’s okay to feel lonely and vulnerable after a break up. You’ve spent a significant amount of time with this guy, so it’s normal that you miss that closeness. And regardless of how good he was in the sack, don’t let your s*x drive be the only thing that’s keeping you with this toxic dude!
S*x is not worth all the trouble he puts you through regularly! You’ll find another guy you’ll be compatible with, and if you keep sleeping with your toxic ex, honey, you are never getting over him.
3. Lean on your friends for support
Once you end the relationship, it’s inevitable that your family and friends are going to have opinions. Listen to them. They are not as emotionally invested as you are, and they can offer you fresh perspectives and make you see what you are oblivious to.
They know you better than anyone, so it’s wise to listen to their advice. Also, they are the ones who are going to be there for you 24/7 whenever you need them. Don’t take them for granted.
4. Give yourself time to grieve
I know you miss having him by your side all the time, but that is perfectly normal. Let yourself grieve for the relationship and find some closure and solace. You miss having that closeness and being connected with a person on such a deep level, but those are feelings we all have, and they will pass!
You just need to go through them first, process it all and take as much time as you need. Don’t give in to temptation and call him. If you do, you are only prolonging the process. Keep your distance, and find your closure. Then, you will be ready to move forward.
5. Don’t be afraid of being single for a little while
Sometimes, being single is exactly what a person needs to find herself again. Try it! Get to know yourself. Remind yourself of how awesome you are and of all the things you are capable of outside of your relationship.
Being with your thoughts can be really inspiring. You will clear your mind of all the negative remains, and fill your life with more positive things. Spend time with your girls, find a hobby, go to the gym, take care of yourself. You will see how good you will start feeling about yourself in no time.
You only need to give yourself a chance to rediscover yourself again, and you will be like a brand new person.