Once upon a time, men were the only ones who had the privilege of asking out a woman they liked. They were the ones making the first moves and the ones initiating all the communication. So basically, if you were a woman in the past and if you liked a guy, you couldn’t do anything about it, except patiently waiting for him to take a hint and to take the first step.
But luckily for both sexes, those times are long gone. Asking a guy out on a date is no longer something shocking. Instead, it is a perfectly natural and normal thing to do.
And it is something you plan on doing, as well. There is this guy you might have met on a dating app or in a real life. Either way, the point is the same. You are crazy about him, but he isn’t making any moves, and you are not sure whether he likes you back.
Instead of waiting for him to do something about it, to read your mind and to magically find out about your feelings, you’ve decided to ask him out on a date. But you don’t know how to do it.
Well, you’ve come to the right place because you are about to read 12 proven ways and pieces of advice on how to ask a guy you like on a date.
1. Think about your expectations
Before asking out a guy you like, firstly you have to be clear and honest with yourself. Think about your expectations of this date.
Where do you plan on drawing the line if the first date happens? How far are you ready to go for him to say ‘yes’ to your invitation?
What do you expect of this date? Do you want to get to know him better and see where the night brings you?
Or do you plan on inviting him over if the date turns out to be successful? Do you see this guy as your future boyfriend and someone with whom you might develop a deeper connection if he is up for it?
Do you expect him to agree on going out with you right away? Or do you think that there is a possibility of him rejecting your proposal?
These are all the questions you should ask yourself before making the first move. Even though it is clear that you can’t have an impact how everything will turn out, and you can’t know his view on things, it is important for you to know what you want. This way, you’ll prepare yourself more, and you’ll have a chance to play your cards just right.
2. See if he likes you
The next step should be trying to realize if this guy likes you. Does he see you as more than a friend or does he think of you as one of the guys? Is there a possibility that he likes you back but is shy and afraid of rejection?
If this is someone you talk to on a regular basis, pay close attention to the non-verbal signs he’s been sending you. Can you see any signs of flirting in this man’s behavior?
Does he touch your arm or leg when he is talking? Does he try to maintain eye contact? Does he compliment you? Is he doing his best to make you laugh?
If the answer to at least some of these questions is positive, then it is more than obvious that he is into you but has trouble making the first step. Remember that not all men are the same and that some of them, including this one, need a little bit more reassurance that the girl they like likes them back before asking her out.
If this is the case with the object of your affection, just go for it. Propose a date activity for the two of you, and I promise you that you won’t get a ‘no’ for an answer.
But on the other hand, there is the possibility that the man you like isn’t showing you any hints that he might see you as more than a friend. Or the two of you don’t have any contact whatsoever, so you can’t tell. This might be some random dude you saw in the bar or a friend of a friend.
Either way, when this is the case, it is crucial for you to put yourself out there before making any moves. He has to start perceiving you as the attractive woman you are before you drop the invitation.
Don’t be scared to flirt with him when you see him in person. Like his social media posts or “accidentally” show up somewhere where you know you could meet him.
The point is to send him non-verbal signals and see if you get any feedback. Just make sure not to exaggerate and to take things slowly.
3. Boost your confidence
Talking to the man you like, let alone asking him out on a date and making the first move, can be scary, and it is everything but easy. So don’t beat yourself up if you are insecure about this. It is perfectly natural to feel this way.
But on the other hand, fear will lead you nowhere, and it can only cause you to miss your chance with him. So, what you need to do is to find ways to raise your confidence before making this move.
Instead of thinking about all the ways in which this man could reject you, think positively. Instead of overthinking about everything that could go wrong, be optimistic, and think about the best possible case scenario.
Be certain of your abilities, and get rid of all the anxious and negative thoughts that might be going through your mind. And even if you feel nervous once you approach him, do your best for
him not to see it. Yes, a little bit of insecurity is cute, but too much of it can chase this guy away.
Go shopping or change your hairstyle—whatever will make you feel better about yourself. Think about everything you’ve accomplished in life so far, and stop considering this date as such a big deal.
Before you ask him out, think of all the good qualities you have. Focus on the things men find attractive about you and on your hot social skills.
Stand in front of the mirror and compliment yourself. Find the thing you like about yourself the most, and put all of your focus on that.
Remember that you are intelligent, funny and witty. You got this!
4. Ask him to hang out with friends
If you are too shy to ask a guy you like on a date, just ask him to hang out with friends. That will definitely take a lot of the pressure away. This way, you’ll get a chance to get to know him better and to see if he has feelings for you without putting yourself out there too much and without taking a concrete step.
The only problem that might occur with this approach is that he might not get the hint. This man might think that you are really asking him out as one of your buddies and that might put you in the friend zone. And let’s face it—this is the last thing you want.
So, the best thing for you to do is to choose this group activity wisely. Plan something that will give you a chance to spend some one-on-one time with him, as well.
The best type of a group date is one with couples, and make sure he knows it, as well. Be clear and don’t make things awkward by putting him in a situation where he isn’t aware of your intentions.
5. Ask a friend to talk to him
Another tip for asking a man out is to ask your mutual friend to talk to him. But don’t get me wrong—this is not me advising you to have your best friend ask this guy out on your behalf because that is something you should never allow to happen. The only way your friend can ask him out is on a group date, where you’ll be present, as well.
Having someone else do your work and ask the man you are into on a date in your name only shows that you are too immature and too insecure. It is childish, and it shows that you are making a big deal out of all this, which can only chase this man away from you.
Instead, ask a friend just to talk to this guy about you, without making anything too obvious. Ask them to mention you in front of him or to propose inviting you to the next group activity. This can help you see this guy’s reaction, and it will make him think of you more.