My dearest,

The thing about loving someone broken is that you don’t get to choose which part of me you’re going to love. You don’t get to choose to be with me on my good days and to disappear on the bad ones. You don’t get to choose to take my happiness and leave me drowning in sorrow. Either you love all of me or you let me go. Because I have had enough of the half love. I have had enough of people who only took the parts of me they liked, leaving me behind in pieces. Leaving me broken, shattered and destroyed to the point where I had nothing left but the sadness. So, this one goes to you, to my future, to my past and to my everything.

I’m asking you to love me right or not love me at all. Because love is not about losing yourself to make another person complete. Love is not about selfish mind games. It’s mutual respect and acceptance of each other’s flaws. It’s knowing that we are not perfect but still loving each other like we are. Because love is what makes us that way. Love is the force that will chase away all of the demons and wipe away all of the tears. But the thing is, it takes two for love to work. It needs more than just me loving and fighting. It takes more than just me trying to keep us in one piece. So, I’m asking you to choose me every day, to fight for me every morning and hold me every night.

I’m asking you to love all of me or to let me go. Because I’m the whole package. You don’t get to pick the parts of me you’re going to love and hate the others. You don’t get to make me feel less worthy just because I was broken. These scars that I’m carrying are not ugly. They are the story of my survival. They are all the lessons I carved into my skin and into my heart, so I don’t forget them. These bruises on my soul are not my choice, but how I’m going to treat them is. And I refuse to let someone hate them and make them bigger just because they can. I know better this time. So, I’m asking you to love my past, to love my curses just as much you’d love my blessings. Because you can’t have the light without the darkness. You can’t have happiness without a little blue.

I’m asking you to love me wholeheartedly or not at all. Is there a sadder word to describe love than ‘almost’? Is there a harder heartbreak than the one where you give your heart and receive nothing but pain in return? Where you’re hoping that maybe, somehow you can make it work, but they gave up on you long time ago? So, I’m asking you to love me wholeheartedly, because I can’t have my heart broken once more by someone who only wanted it for games. By someone I hoped will cherish it and hold it like I’m holding his, only to drop it and watch when it shatters into millions of pieces. I can’t have my heart broken once more by almost love.

I’m asking you to hold me tight or don’t hold me at all. I’m asking you to hold me tight when life is tearing me apart, so I can hold you, too. I’m asking you to hold me tight when hurricanes and storms are up on the horizon. When everything seems like it’s doomed, I need you to be my blessing. I need you to be the light to my darkness, to be the calm to my storm. I need you to be here to pick me up so I can do the same for you. I need you to love me as fiercely as I would love you, too. I need you to be my first, my last, my everything.


View all posts

Add comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *