One of the most difficult things that may happen to you after a breakup is wanting your ex back. Surprisingly, this happens to a lot of people; sometime after ending a relationship, they realize they truly love their former partner and become eager to win them back. This isn’t an easy goal to achieve, however, due to various reasons that only your ex knows.
Don’t fret, though. While it can be hard to accomplish, winning your ex boyfriend or girlfriend back is doable. You just need a lot of patience and a clear intention as to why you want him or her back. Among the best ways that can help you achieve this goal are:
1. Get yourself back together.
It’s expected that you feel lost and broken after enduring the breakup, but after spending time to cry and vent, you have to get back on your feet as soon as you can. Find ways to uplift your confidence by doing a makeover and shaping up –both physically and emotionally. You have to bring back the person you were back when he or she first got attracted to you, the person they wanted to be with. Once you have that re-established, the more likely will they take an interest at you again.
2. Act like you were not affected by the breakup.
Faking it may be hard to do, but yes, it is necessary when you are trying to get your ex back. You have to act like you have already moved on from the pain and are not affected by the breakup at all. This is necessary because it triggers the other party’s pride in one way or another.
If your partner broke up with you because they chose another person, acting like you were not affected somehow ticks their nerves in a way that they couldn’t believe you’ve actually moved on from what happened. They’d also see the person they lost that moment they chose to end the relationship, and this would give them more reason to contemplate about coming back to you.
3. Let them notice you, but don’t make the first move to reach out.
It is important that you make your ex notice you. However, you have to do this subliminally. Show off in your social media accounts by flaunting your post-breakup confident self, making a good impression on the friends you share with them, and by shrugging off the topic about your breakup.
However, it is also a must that you do not make the first move when reaching out to your ex. This will only make your intentions obvious, and doing so just makes it seems like your efforts are all because you want them back in your life. That makes you look desperate, and that’s not something you want them to even think about. Let them be the first to chat you on Facebook, send you a private message, or call you over the phone.
4. Rekindle the friendship, but don’t go overboard.
Once your ex reaches out to you, indulge in a conversation. Talk to them, enjoy the chats and even the succeeding meetups. Savor the time you two are rebuilding the friendship that died along with the breakup, but at the same time don’t go overboard. Remind yourself that you two are just friends and nothing more yet. This is because your ex needs to realize the salience of your presence in their lives, now more than ever. They have to wake up on their own and not be nudged by you.
5. Do the things you wished you did back when you were still in a relationship.
Were there things you regret not doing when you were still a couple? In this phase, you may want to bring them to life. These may include cooking them a scrumptious meal, writing them sweet letters, attending events that are special to their life (such as games in which they are players), and even being friends with the people that matter to them.
It is important that you get to do the things you missed out on because these are the things that your ex most likely looked for when you two were still together. Seeing you doing these will definitely remind them why they wanted to be with you in the first place, and now that these things are coming to life, returning to you is going to be worth a try.
6. Make every moment together meaningful.
Let’s say the ex you want to get back with is seeing someone else. If you have already started doing the aforementioned steps, then it would be easier to snatch moments with your ex as they are under the assumption that you are spending time together as friends. In this regard, it is important that you are able to make every second, minute, and hour count.
Make them see that you are not worth letting go again. Let them feel that they are becoming the best version of themselves whenever they are with you, and not with anyone else-not even the person they are now seeing.
Once they realize this, they will definitely beg you to take them back into your life and rekindle your relationship.
7. Once they ask for another chance, level off.
Once your ex says they want to give your relationship another chance, you may first want to ask why they thought so. Ask them for their intentions, so that you two can level off as to how the relationship should go moving forward. If you are convinced by their explanation for wanting you back, then say yes.
When working towards getting your ex back, you should also be sure with your intentions. Do you want this because you really love the person and the relationship, or you just feel cheated on want to get back with a vengeance? Is it really worth the effort to make them come back to you? Do you really see yourself with them in the future?
Rekindling an old flame opens a can of worms and reawakens ghosts from the past. If you think these are worth facing again, then by all means, work towards getting your ex back. However, if the answer is no, then perhaps you just have to move on, and move forward with life.