Loving somebody who doesn’t love you back can have serious consequences on your psyche and the way you see yourself.
You can easily change from a happy and content person to a depressed and broken one. This is why you need to snap out of it, as fast as you can, and start doing everything you can in order to get over the unreciprocated love that is consuming your life.
Getting over any relationship is difficult, and it takes time. But having to get over someone who never knew how to love you back can be just as painful, if not more. It’s important to tell yourself that you are not defined by this, and that whoever is supposed to be in your life and love you, will find their way to you. Everything else is a waste of time.
The more you tell yourself that, the easier it will be to accept it, and move on.
Here are some helpful tips that might be useful in the process.
1. As painful as it is, accept that he doesn’t love you the way you want him to
Believe him when he shows how little he cares. If there are days when you think that he actually does love you, and then there are also days when he completely disregards you and days go by without him getting in touch, it is clear that there is no love there.
This isn’t love that he’s trying to sell you. If he only thinks of you when it’s convenient for him or when he feels lonely, it’s not love. It’s convenience.
Next time you want to call him or see him, just remember how little he thinks of you and that the only time you do actually see him is when HE decides it.
Move on from this. Tell yourself you deserve more, and don’t pick up the phone when you see his number. Slowly, it will start getting easier.
2. Find something better and more exciting to do that will distract you from him
The less you see him, the less you’ll feel the need to! This should be your main concern. If you are able, go somewhere far away, if you can, of course. Choose a place that will remind you of him the least, and preoccupy yourself with hobbies and activities that will make it almost impossible to think of him.
It might sound obvious, but the less time you spend with him and the less time you spend thinking of him, the sooner you will get over him. It will become so much easier with time that you won’t believe how amazing you can actually feel without him.
Good friends and a hobby that you are passionate about can be a cure for your unrequited love.
3. Put yourself at the top of your priority list for once
When something like this starts consuming you and your every thought, you usually forget that you need to take care of yourself.
What might help you is to talk to those you’re closest to in life. Vent to them. It’s easier to share your hardships with someone who loves you. They will make sure you know you’re not alone.
Also, you are not the only person to ever have to go through this. And I mean this in a good way. That means that many people before you have managed to get through this, and many will continue to do it after you. And guess what else, so will you!
This is why you need to realize that you need to prioritize yourself above anyone else. When you are happy with yourself and able to be alone and NOT feel lonely is when you are fully healed.
Once you realize how important YOU and your feelings are, you will not settle for anything less.