1. When he wants to hold your hand in public.
I don’t know about you, but to me that is a step up from sitting next to each other at the lunch table or passing notes with hearts drawn all over them. Real deal PDA.
2. He contacts you. Every single day.
Not all day, but just enough to inform you that he is not in jail or that he is not dead in some strip club somewhere in Vegas.
3. The moment you trade in your goblet of wine and fictional relationship with The Bachelor to go hang out with a real man.
4. When he lets you listen to your choice of music in the car.
Nickleback, Spice Girls, Aretha Franklin.. Doesn’t matter how much you test the music boundaries, he just goes with it.
5. When you are finally not embarrassed to eat messy food in front of him.
Or bananas. Or really…anything.
6. When you feel that you can truly trust him.
And you don’t worry about where he is or who he’s with.
7. When you can introduce him to your friends.
And you know he will not say something idiotic like, “So are you the crazy one that she is always bitching about?”.
8. When he is cool with watching anything you want to watch on TV.
Binge on Making a Murderer for 7 hours straight? Done!
9. When you know that he is not afraid to be seen in public with you.
Even if it is after multiple adult beverages, you literally have to lean on him for support and you keep telling strangers about that time you met Hanson and it was magical.
10. When he enjoys going on adventures with you.
Not just to the bar down the street where you could see crazy Larry do bar lap dances again, but to a museum and see how long it takes you before you get kicked out.
11. When you are not afraid to be seen by him when you are not in your “prime”.
No matter how much you look like Lindsay Lohan, post Mean Girls.
12. When you are ready to introduce him to your family.
More so your dog. Your family will be there too, but the dog comes first.
13. When he finally realizes you will always love your dog more than you can ever love him.
Because again, the dog comes first and he is okay with that.
14. When you want the same things.
Like when he realizes that when you retire you would rather have a house full of puppies rather than a house full of snot-nosed grandchildren and he is okay with that too.
15. When you let him see you cry.
Not just cry, but ugly Kim Kardasian while watching the end of Marley and Me cry. SCARY.
16. When he lets you bitch on the phone for an hour about someone stealing your banana at work.
Because frankly that is just non-sense. Unnecessary bitch fest, but you are hangry and people need to keep their hands off other people’s bananas!
17. When he understands a good balance of what people need to know about your relationship and privacy
Meaning: He doesn’t check with his girlfriend at every location on Facebook, doesn’t Instagram a picture of his girlfriend with her dinner and doesn’t snap chat video the entire movie that him and his girlfriend are about to see. WE GET IT LOVE BIRDS, NOW KNOCK IT OFF.
18. When you can ACTUALLY sleep together.
And get the kind of full night’s rest next to him and not be weirded out by how much drool is going to be on the pillow in the morning, fear that you are going to have a kicking and screaming dream about midgets or be afraid that he may kill you in your sleep.
19. When he snapchats you funny animal videos until 3 AM.
And you know you are going to be exhausted at work the next day, but you are smitten by him and his love of bull dogs.
20. When he is not afraid to tell his friends he is not going out with them tonight, he is going out with his favorite gal.
And by going out I mean staying at home for Netflix and chill. And by Netflix and chill, I mean the new Tina Fey movie is on there and I want some popcorn so we can extra chill.
21. You can’t keep your hands off of him.
Cause it is cold and he refuses to give up his hoodie or the blanket to keep you warm.
22. When you have this dumb smile on your face during the middle of the day for no reason other than he came across your mind
Then you get all these little butterflies in your stomach and you can’t help but think you are the luckiest for having a guy as swell as him. And then I come walking by and roll my eyes are you and tell you to knock it off. Five seconds later you are back to doing it again.