The process of forgiving is never easy.
This is especially the case when it comes to people who have done you harm and haven’t lifted a finger to correct their mistakes, so they clearly don’t deserve your forgiveness.
However, you need to find the strength to forgive the ones who hurt you not for their sake but because of you.
Once you do, you’ll see how liberating and freeing it is to accept the apologies you never got.
After reading all of this, you must be wondering how to make yourself forgive?
Well, all you have to do is follow this 15 days challenge and I promise you that you’ll let go and move on in two weeks’ time.
Stage 1: Grieve
Decide to stop repressing your emotions and realize that this practice will get you nowhere.
Give yourself a deadline—a day up until which you’re allowed to suffer.
Drive yourself to a forest or a high mountain and scream as loudly as you can.
Release the negativity and the anger until you lose your voice.
Spend an entire day watching sad movies and just cry.
Eat junk food, don’t even take a shower unless you really have to and cry all of your sadness out.
Use tears as a way to cleanse your soul and I promise you that you’ll feel much better after this session.
Take a day off from work or school, put your phone on airplane mode, lock all the doors, darken the room, listen to sad songs and start the grieving process.
Accept that you’re a human being who is allowed to be sad and allowed to suffer.
Call a friend and share your sadness with them.
Don’t be ashamed of your emotions because they don’t make you weak—they only make you human.
Do your best to forget about the problem for the day.
You’ve successfully finished this grieving phase and today is the day for you to take a break and prepare yourself for the next phase.
Stage 2: Make some changes
Take some concrete action regarding the anger that’s been eating you alive.
Enough with the crying; it is about time to make some changes, if there is a possibility of doing so.
This day is reserved for writing a letter to everyone you have the need to address.
You don’t have to actually send these letters—it will be easier for you to write all the emotions you have on a piece of paper because that way, you’ll feel like you’ve said them out loud and all of this will have a cathartic effect.
The next day, after you have spilled all of your emotions onto paper, it is time to reread your letters.
Try and observe everything you’ve written as if it was someone else’s work.
Be as realistic as possible and try to objectify your anger.
Make some crucial differences in your life and mindset.
Make a plan of forming new habits and new daily routines which include different thoughts as well.
Once you have analyzed your anger and all other negative emotions, it is time to cut off the people who caused it.
Don’t feel bad about choosing yourself over anyone who doesn’t bring you any good.
Go no contact and break all ties today, without waiting any longer.
Again, take a break.
You took one of the most important steps yesterday and it is time for some time off from this problem.
Stage 3: Accept
Today is the day in which you write a personal progress journal.
Be proud of yourself and how far you’ve gotten.
Focus on the positive things you’ve managed to achieve and compare your emotions from day one to this day.
Stop blaming yourself and stop looking for closure and apologies you clearly won’t get.
Accept that this is the end of things and lose all hope that someday, you’ll get a different result.
Instead, try making the best of what you have.
Leave the past behind you, where it belongs, and close that chapter of your life.
Move on and let go of all negativity and bad emotions!
Congratulations, you’re finally ready to live a life free of all grudges and resentment because you healed in a healthy way.