The most dramatic and romance-filled moments on TV and in movies always happen face-to-face. If a character texted their confession of love, it wouldn’t have quite the same impact.
But IRL, we’re most likely going to text the object of our affection, whether they’re a crush, someone we’ve gone on two dates with, or they’re our official boyfriend.
Texting seems like the best way to go since we can feel free to say whatever we want without having to look someone in the eyes or feel awkward or nervous. Of course, we feel like we have serious butterflies in our stomach while we wait for the response to come in, so it’s still a stressful experience.
Girls often say that guys don’t know how to text or what to say, and honestly, guys can come right back and say, “Same.” It’s a good reminder that we’re all just trying our past when we’re out there in the dating world… and maybe we should rethink some of the text messages that we’re sending.
There are many common text messages that we send the guys in our lives… and guys think that it’s time to stop. Here are 10 texts that guys wish that girls would stop sending, along with 10 that they wish we would send instead.
20-Stop Sending: What Are You Up To?
When we send this text message to a guy, it puts pressure on him. He thinks that he has to come up with something interesting to say, and he doesn’t want to just text back “nothing.” Of course, that’s what he usually ends up saying, and then he wonders why he can’t come up with anything more interesting.
This is one of the text messages that guys wish that girls would stop sending. While it makes sense that we would want to ask him what he’s doing, it’s good to remember that he doesn’t love this kind of text. There’s definitely something that we can text instead.
19-Send Instead: Hope You’re Having A Good Day
It would be much better to text “Hope you’re having a good day.” This is sweet and simple and to the point. This is the kind of text message that would cheer him up if he’s not having the greatest morning or afternoon… and if he’s already in a good mood, then it would at least make him smile.
If we send this text message, no guy would complain or have a problem with it. It’s also a good text to send since it would get the conversation flowing. He can tell us about his day and ask about ours.
18-Stop Sending: Did You Get My Last Message?
Every girl has sent a guy this text. We just can’t help but text him this when we haven’t heard from him in a few hours.
This is definitely one of the text messages that guys wish girls would stop sending, though. It makes them feel bad and like they did something wrong by not responding. After all, there’s probably a reason why they didn’t get back to us yet. They could have been in a work meeting or running some errands. It doesn’t always mean something negative (but it can be tough to remember that). There’s something else that we can say to him.
17-Send Instead: Let Me Know When You Want To Hang Out Again
When we want to text him and ask if he got our last text message, we should text him this instead: “Let me know when you want to hang out again.”
This is more chill and will put less pressure on him. When we want to ask him why he didn’t answer our last text message, we’re usually in the early months of a relationship or we haven’t even gotten to that official point yet. Letting him know that we’d like to see him again and leaving the ball in his court is a good idea. He’ll like hearing this and will tell us when we can go out again.
16-Stop Sending: I’m So Annoyed/Worried/Upset Right Now
This is another text message that guys wish girls would stop sending. It’s only going to upset him and stress him out. After all, if we’re texting our boyfriend this, then we’re not hanging out with him, and so he can’t really do anything about it.
He might even want to send a text right back asking, “What am I supposed to do about that?” But he knows that’s not the nicest thing to say, so he might feel a bit torn about how to respond. If we think about how we feel when a relative or friend sends us some stressed out text messages, then we know how it feels to be on the receiving end.
15-Send Instead: Would It Be Cool If I Vent Later?
“Would it be cool if I vent later?” is a text message that guys wish that girls would send instead. This is the perfect thing to say because it lets him know that we’re worried or upset about something, but it also tells him that we’re not about to send him a million panicked text messages. It gives him the chance to prepare for an emotional chat once we do see him.
This is definitely a good reminder for us that even if we want to text our boyfriend everything, it’s often better to have the conversation when we can sit face-to-face.
14-Stop Sending: I Don’t Know
When a guy sends a girl a text message, he really doesn’t want her to say “I don’t know.” It’s another text that guys wish that girls would stop sending. It’s a frustrating response because we’re not telling him anything.
If we put ourselves in our boyfriend’s shoes then, sure, we can totally see why he would be annoyed by this type of text message. If we asked him what we should do this weekend or if he wants to come to a party that we just got invited to and he said “I don’t know” we would be pretty frustrated.
13-Send Instead: Yes (Or No)
Guys wish that girls would send an actual answer instead, so texting him “yes” or “no” is definitely a better idea. It’ll let him know how we really feel about whatever he’s asking us, even if it’s about dinner or weekend plans.
If guys could get together and decide on the text messages that they would love for girls to send them, “yes” or “no” would totally be at the top of the list. We just need to remember that guys love when we’re straightforward and as honest as possible. They don’t want a lot of dancing around or “I don’t know’s.”
12-Stop Sending: Why Do You Have To Go Out With Your Friends This Weekend?
Everyone has a different comfort level when it comes to their social life and how often they like to go out and have fun. Our new boyfriend might be super used to going out with his friends every Saturday night… and that’s not the best news for us because we want to be his Saturday night date every week.
When a girl is in this situation, she always wants to text her boyfriend and ask him why he’s doing this, but that’s not the best way to go. He’s just going to get frustrated and feel like she’s trying to control his schedule.
11-Send Instead: Let’s Have Dinner Together On Sunday If You’re Free
Guys totally wish that girls would send this text message instead. It’s a positive text message to send our boyfriend or the guy that we’re dating since we’re asking him about plans instead of complaining that he’s not hanging out with us one weekend evening.
Sure, of course it’s legit that we want to spend more time as a couple, but we can talk to him about that in person. It’s so much better to text about making plans instead of trying to talk about more serious topics. It’s just not the best form of communication for that since so many things can get totally lost in translation.
10-Stop Sending: Did You Get Groceries?
When we’re wondering if he’s done a chore that we’ve asked him to do, texting him about it isn’t going to make him feel great. This is another text message that guys don’t want girls to send.
It will only make him feel like we’re putting pressure on him… and it might also make him feel like we don’t think that he’s actually going to buy groceries or whatever we asked him to do. Would we want him to send us the same kind of text message? Definitely not, right? It’s much better to ask him in person (as long as we say it in a sweet way).
9-Send Instead: Thanks For Always Taking Care Of Me
Yes, we want to know if our boyfriend bought the groceries that he promised, but asking him isn’t going to be the right way to go.
“Thanks for always taking care of me” is a really lovely text message to send him. He’s going to be so glad that we told him this, and as a bonus, it’ll totally remind him that he said that he would buy us groceries after work today. He’ll immediately think about it… and we didn’t even have to ask him straight-up.
There is always a nicer and better way to phrase something, especially when we’re talking to the person that we love.
8-Stop Sending: My Friend Sarah’s Boyfriend Just Got Her Roses
Texting him “My friend Sarah’s boyfriend just got her roses” isn’t going to make him feel like the Boyfriend Of The Year when in reality he’s probably very close to that title. Playing the comparison game is normal but not a good idea.
Guys would admit that this isn’t a text message that they ever want to get. They would only hear, “You didn’t get me roses” and then wonder if they should be buying us flowers all the time. While it’s a nice gesture and of course girls love getting flowers, is that really what makes a good relationship? Of course not.
7-Send Instead: I Love You
“I love you” is a much better text message to send him. It’s short and sweet and exactly what we want to say to him. Instead of complaining that he didn’t buy us roses and acting like he should be in trouble for that, we’re explaining how we feel.
Every guy is going to love getting this text message from his girlfriend. In fact, they probably wish that she would text them this all the time. Honestly, when a couple is really in love, they can’t tell each other that enough times. It’s just always sweet and welcome, and he’s going to, well, love it.
6-Stop Sending: You Haven’t Made Any Time For Me This Week
Couples get busy and go days without seeing each other. It can feel really bad and like our boyfriend isn’t making time for us right now, and we start to wonder if he feels like his job or friends or another part of his world is more important and special.
We really want to text him “You haven’t made any time for me this week” but this is another text message that guys wish that girls would stop sending. He’s going to read this text and be upset, and that’s not going to help matters much. There is definitely a better text to send instead.
5-Send Instead: I Miss You
Isn’t “I miss you” such a sweet text message to send him? Best of all, he will smile so big when he reads this message and send the same thing right back. This is a text message that every guy would love to get from his girlfriend or the girl who he wants to name his girlfriend very soon.
This is so much better than telling him that he’s not making time for us this week. He knwos that he’s been super busy and we shouldn’t make him feel bad about it. After all, we all have those days or weeks, and we can get back on track as a couple for sure.
4-Stop Sending: We Need To Talk
Does “we need to talk” ever sound good? Probably not. We don’t want to hear this from our boyfriend and yet we wouldn’t think twice about texting him these words… mostly because we’re all fired up over chatting with him about something serious.
Many girls will send their boyfriend this text message because they want to let him know that it’s time for a more serious conversation. Of course, they mean well and they just want to prepare him, but he’s not going to take it super well. This isn’t a text message that guys want to get, that’s for sure.
3-Send Instead: I Want To Tell You Something When I Get Home
This is a much better text message to send him, and it’s one that he wishes that we would send instead. It lets him know that we want to talk about something but it doesn’t make him worried that we’re going to break up with him. Even if we don’t want to end the relationship, we definitely know that the phrase “we need to talk” often signals a breakup, so we want to avoid that.
If we say “I want to tell you something when I get home” this text message has a much better vibe. Saying that we want to “tell him something” is much nicer and gentler. He’ll appreciate it.
2-Stop Sending: Why Are You Ignoring Me?
Guys also wish that girls would stop sending them this text message. They probably want to send this type of message sometimes, too, since everyone has experienced being ignored by someone who they’re dating.
Unfortunately, being so straightforward might not work out too well and he might get upset that we’re saying this to him. If we’re in a relationship with him or we want to be, he’s not going to love that we’re saying that he’s ignoring us. Maybe he’s busy and can’t have a real conversation right now. Unless he’s been ignoring our text messages for a few days or a full week, it’s best to be a bit calmer.
1-Send Instead: I’ll Let You Focus On Work, Let’s Talk Later
Guys wish that girls would text this instead, and it’s easy to see why, right? This is a much gentler way of phrasing what we really want to say: that he’s not answering our text messages right now.
When we send our boyfriend this text message, he’ll be glad to receive it and it’ll make him feel like we understand why he can’t text back right now. After all, he’s totally entiled to having a busy day at work, right? It just means that we can have a much better IRL chat once we both get home from work, and that’s something nice to look forward to.